Have you ever...

...hung out in the bathroom just a little bit longer because you were enjoying your alone time a little too much?

Thankful Thursday

On this beautiful, freezing, sunshiny, snowy day I am thankful...

...that I have a warm home to cozy up in on cold days like this one.

...that my kids like to play outside and are old enough to go out by themselves!

...that we made it home safe last night. We had dinner at some friend's house up in the mountains and the roads were clear on the way home up until we hit the south side of town. From there on we could barely see 10 feet in front of us. Mark had driven a separate car and we both had trouble. From sliding to poor visibility to almost hitting crazy, suicidal deer, we were THANKFUL to get home safe!

...that Kate and Mark are feeling much, much better.

...for coffee. I did not sleep much at all last night {sick littlest man} and I'm glad for coffee. Although I'm not sure there is enough in my house to keep these eye-lids open.

Baby Stellan

A while back I blogged about a couple people's blogs that I've been following who inspire me and challenge me. I'm challenged by many of the blogs I read, but these two in particular have touched me. And I don't even know them in real life! I posted links to them on the top left of my blog.

Anyway, that sweet little boy Stellan {the one in the picture}, is not doing well. He's back in the hospital. I just love this little guy with his little sick heart. I can't quite explain why I'm drawn to him. Maybe it's because he's adorable. Or because he's a couple months younger than Jack {Stellan's first birthday is tomorrow}. Or because he's a fighter. Or because God has saved him time and time again. Or because his mom is a very real person dealing with very real things. I have laughed at her posts as well as cried. Or maybe it's because he is a reminder to me of just how harsh this life can be. How sinful and fallen this world is. I mean when bad things happen to little kids it makes me cry out to God more and more for His healing, His grace, His mercy, His love. And I am doing it again today.

This morning I checked their blog and found out that he went back into the hospital last night. It is the worst he has ever been. As of right now he is doing better but there is still a long ways to go. I'm blogging about it and asking you to pray for him. Pray for healing in his little heart. Pray for his parents. I can't even imagine how they are feeling right now. The pictures his mom has posted break my heart into a hundred pieces. And he's not even my son. Pray for wisdom for the Drs. Pray for a short hospital stay. Pray he gets to go home and celebrate his first birthday without tubes and monitors and IVs. Pray he gets to eat cake and open presents.

I'm just praying for Stellan.

*You can click on his picture and it will take you to the website if you'd like updates.

What's up Doc?

Oh my, what a week. Actually it's only been 6 days but it really feels like much more. I guess that happens. I realized that I haven't updated my blog with Kate's situation so I thought I'd take a few minutes and do just that.

I basically filled in everything from Wednesday and Thursday here so I'll pick up after that. I had myself a mini-meltdown on Thursday morning. Not wanting to have to deal with this. Not wanting to not go to Denver. Not wanting to deal with this by myself {Mark was busy literally all weekend}. So I cried, had myself a nice little pity party. I'm sorry I didn't invite you :)

Anyway, I got over it, sucked it up, decided I was the parent and I had to do what I had to do. It is what it is. I can do this. {that was my pep talk} I took Kate back to the Dr on Friday to see if the treatments and the medicines were helping with her O2 level. It was. Enough to keep her out of the hospital but not quite enough to keep her off the O2 :( So we went home again with the knowledge that it was going to be a long weekend fighting the O2 issue.

Mark was gone most of the day Friday and Friday night - for an awesome youth concert at church, then he left Saturday morning and was gone all day to help clean up and set up for church, then Sunday morning he had to be at church at 6:45am to finish setting things up. We did not get to see him much. Oh and he also got sick. So when he has been home he's been quite miserable himself.

So Kate and I have gone rounds about wearing the O2 and trying to stay out of the hospital. She's not an easy patient. I'm not expecting her to be cheerful, in fact I wouldn't like having to do everything she's having to do either, but she can be down right....what's the word?...cranky! And frankly so can I. We've had issue with the medicine taking, the O2 wearing, the cartoon and movie watching, the food eating, the liquid drinking, the potty going, the little girl sleeping, the brother annoying, and the Dr going. But the good news is that she's much, much better. She's running around and playing with her brothers, eating better, and being more like her normal self. The treatments are working!

Jack, I believe, is teething. My clues are the liquid poo coming from one end and the constant stream of drool coming from the other. I think by the time he went down for his first nap yesterday {9am} I'd changed him 4 times. Yummy.

Kale's a bit jealous of the attention Kate's getting as well as being a bit stir crazy. I was able to get him out of the house yesterday. The Blegers came and picked him up and took him to church. Thank goodness! He needed some friend time. He's been a trooper but he, like myself, can only take so much.

I've been sleeping on the couch for the past 3 nights. I've needed as much sleep as I can get and with Mark feeling like he's been feeling...well I get more sleep on the couch.

This morning my kids woke up at 7:30am {I know I'm not complaining about that I promise!} but were both in time out by 8:30. That's about when my good attitude starting going downhill. Struggling to get it back. Mark didn't go to work today. Thankfully he was given the day off to rest and hopefully recover from this massive head cold. I'm glad he's here because I have to take Kate back to the Dr this morning for another check up. Hopefully we come home with no more O2! Oh I pray so. It's funny how we get tired of routine but when life is completely changed upside down we long for that boring routine!

I'm just exhausted. A little overwhelmed with the state of my house and laundry. Many things have been put on the back burner due to O2 monitoring. Need to start catching up but would rather blog about my issues :) *sigh* You just caught me in a mood. It will pass soon. Although at this exact moment my kids are screaming from the couch that the TV went off. *double sigh*

Oh Lord, give me Your strength and patience today. Mine is all runned out!

We all wanna be right

As someone who has worked in more than one ministry {4 or 5 actually} I can tell you that I have, on occasion :) fallen into this. The desire to be right. The desire to make my "passion" everyone's passion. The desire to bring my ministry, my calling, to the forefront and make it known to everyone just how important my ministry is. Wow. How crazy and selfish am I?

Quite, actually. I think that this is something that every single one of us humans has a problem with. And it's not that it's a big problem in the beginning but it can turn into one. Let me explain.

When I was a youth pastor, teenagers were my passion. I loved everything about them. They were cool and fun and I loved hanging out with them, teaching them, and mentoring them. {good} I figured everyone should love it as much as I do. {not so good} I was amazed at some people's attitudes towards youth ministry. People were afraid of the teens, didn't want to volunteer, didn't want to give money to our ministry etc...it broke my heart. These teens were worth it! They deserved better!

Then I moved into Children's ministry. And kids became my passion. I loved teaching, hugging and loving the kids. {good} I felt like they had been forgotten. I was appalled that people {including parents} wouldn't volunteer to love our kids, teach them God's word, and help bring them up. It was such an important ministry. How could anyone see it any different? {not good}

I also have served in women's ministry. I loved getting to know women, hearing their struggles, praying for them, ministering to them, having fun with them. {good} How could people not all jump at the chance to serve women? {not good} They deserve it!

Now I'm doing our greeter ministry and am watching Mark lead worship. Two other very important ministries. Why don't people jump at the chance to serve there?

All of these ministries are important to God. All of them were important to me. Why was I so upset that they weren't important to everyone else?

Because God gave ME the heart for each ministry. God showed ME how to be an advocate for each one, how to love each one, how to serve each one, how to grow each one and how to be changed by each one. Am I right because I've loved each ministry? No. Is everyone else wrong because they don't share my passion for each one? No. Then why do I/we live like that?

I'm not saying that the world is relative and there is no right and wrong, that's not what I'm talking about here. I'm talking about the life that each one of us has. Why do we insist on thinking everyone should agree with everything we do? Is it so we are validated? So that we can be encouraged that we're doing the right ministry or raising our children right or believing the right politics? How sad are we?

I've seen people devastated in ministry because their ministry didn't get the attention they thought it deserved. They were bitter because their ministry wasn't highlighted, wasn't given the funding, wasn't given the attention by the "appropriate" people. They quit. They gave up. Sadly their audience wasn't the important ONE. The important ONE is God. Instead of looking to God for encouragement, validation etc... they looked to man. Man-who will always fail us. Always. Youth, children, greeters, missions, worship, sound, tech., orphans, men, women, singles, married, college...you name it, they all want to be the most important ministry. And they should be. Because they are all important to God. And He gives each of us a heart for that ministry. A heart to help. A heart to love, to minister, to be Jesus. We just can't expect everyone to feel the exact same way that we do. God gives each of us a heart for that ministry during that season for a reason. To bring attention to them maybe. Who knows. But we need to stop freaking out when others don't feel the same. God will take care of it. He will bring others with the same heart to our ministry. We just need to be obedient to what He's asked us to do. And stop being distracted by what we think others ought to be doing.

It doesn't stop in ministry either. I've seen parents like this. They are adamant about the choices they've made for their children and want everyone to agree. Like they are horrible parents if no else is doing it the exact same way they are. Adamant that you give birth naturally, or take drugs, breastfeed or bottle-feed, adopt or get pregnant, have a dozen children or none, spank or not, organic food or not, pacifiers or not, homeschool or public school, cloth diapers or disposable etc...It's insane! I've definitely, at times, been part of the problem. Hard to admit that I wanted others to agree with how I was raising my children in order to feel like I was doing the right thing. Instead of asking God, the ONE who gave me these children, if I was doing alright, I looked to others. And frankly, it made/makes me miserable. Because not everyone does it the same. They're not supposed to. And I'm not failing because I don't do it like everyone else. I'm not a bad parent because I gave birth to my children, breastfed them, disposable diapered them, spanked them on occasion, gave them whatever food I have, pacifiered them, homeschooled them and loved them. Nor are you a bad parent if you don't do any of this! Why must we constantly compare?

I think it has to do with our need to feel good. To feel right. Ugh! We all just wanna be right. Let's stop the madness. Let's stop the judgment. Let's look to HIM for our validation, our encouragement, our instructions, our worth. Man {woman} will fail us. Every time.

Have you ever...

...eaten the rest of the pie {ice cream, cookies, cake, candy bag etc...} just because you didn't want it to keep tempting you to eat it? Makes sense to me!

The world according to Jack

I had to blog about this because I was thinking about it the other day as I was chasing my youngest, yet again, out of a cupboard. What must life be like for this little guy? This is what I came up with.

According to Jack:

~toys aren't all that great unless they belong to the sister or the brother

~cupboards are lots of fun, especially if mom and dad say don't touch or not for you

~candles are so yummy to chew on that I'll go back for more even when I'm in trouble

~kisses are ok but if you want one watch out - they come with lots of slobber

~there are way too many buttons on TVs, VCR's, DVD players, iPods and computers to touch all in one day but it's worth trying

~walking is fabulous so try all day long with no breaks

~toilets are amazing! Why can't there be water in everything?

~cats and dogs are so cool. They lick, make funny noises and run from little people. Good exercise.

~daddy and bubba can be said sweetly, mama, on the other hand, must be yelled with a touch of screeching for emphasis

~people love smiles. They always smile back.

~food is made for eating but in reality it's opportunity for creative expression

~sippy cups are the bomb

~along the same line, milk is amazing!

~oh and pop tarts are divine

~anytime music is playing one must stop what they are doing and dance. It's just the way it is.

~pacifiers and blankets are a must for sleeping

~everything a big kid does must be tried - no matter the cost

Just a few examples of what I believe is running around my 1 yr olds head throughout the day.

Thankful Thursday

Of course today is thankful Thursday, and as usual, it's perfect timing.

This week has been crazy. So much going on and I've been preparing for a trip to Denver with the kids this weekend. I had planned on leaving today and spending time at my parents house with family in Denver and also visiting with my sister who lives in NY and my grandpa who lives in TX who were to be in Denver at the same time. I was very much looking forward to it.

But then yesterday my little Kate started not feeling well. It came on just after lunch. And went downhill very fast. We were at a friend's house in Mancos and by the time we got home Kate was wheezing and whimpering. Basically the rest of the evening and night, Mark and I were taking turns snuggling Kate, giving her nebulizer treatments, watching the boys, and praying that Kate would recover quickly.

First thing this morning I called and got her a Dr's appointment. We went in and she was really not breathing well. Her breathing was very labored. The Dr did a strep test {which was negative}, a flu test {also negative}, tested her blood O2 levels and gave her another nebulizer treatment. Kate's O2 levels were low - 82%. The Drs are very concerned when it's below 88%. It means there is not enough oxygen getting into the blood stream and therefore not enough O2 getting to the rest of the body. After the nebulizer treatment, however, it came up to 87-88%. Getting better but not good enough. After wrangling her and bribing her with all kinds of wonderful treats, I got her to put on O2 and when they tested her again after that, her levels were 92%. Good enough to go home and not have to stay in the hospital {which was a decision that was not far behind...}

SO, we are home {and sadly, will not be going to Denver}, she's sleeping, she has 2 more steroid prescriptions that she will be on for the next week, and she is on O2 while resting or sleeping {she hates being on oxygen and I don't blame her}. We have another Dr appt in the morning to see if the O2 is helping. If her levels are not improved then it's off to the hospital we go. I am praying that won't happen. Mark has a very busy weekend with the church and our boys will have to be shuffled from place to place.

SO, this week, on my thankful Thursday, I was planning on what to write and I found it surprisingly much easier than I thought it would be. I know that having a thankful heart has improved my "skills" at finding the positive and choosing to focus on that rather than the negative. Here it goes.

I am thankful...

...that Kate does not have H1N1. It would be incredibly difficult for her since it will attack the respiratory system and hers is already weak. And it is going around Durango.

...that my boys aren't sick. What a crazier mess if they were feeling the way she does!

...that I'm not sick! I can't even begin think of what it would be like to take care of myself, sicko Kate, and 2 active boys....

...that we are not in the hospital right now.

...that we have great Drs and nurses who are very helpful and caring. They were awesome today at the office.

...that I have great friends that I know that if I need anything they will help me - I've been told if I don't use that help I will be in serious trouble :)

...that I have wonderful family who, I know, would be here in a heartbeat if they didn't live 7 hours away.

...for Mark. He works so hard for us and I'm thankful that he's so good at what he does.

...for Kale's sweet attitude. He knows it's been, and is going to be, tough. He's just been a joy today.

...for the prayers that I know will be said for us. Thank you for your love!

A couple conversations

One of the things I love about writing a blog is being able to capture and remember the funny conversations we've had with our kids. There were several this week, and with each child actually, so I definitely had to sit down and share it.

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As we were leaving church:

Kale: Are we going the short way home? {there are 2 ways home from church - thru town or a back way - they are about equally distant}

Mark: We're going through town.

Kale: Good, cause I want to see all of God's creation, not just trees and rocks. I want to see cars and houses and stop signs and lights...

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Right before Mark and Kale were leaving to run an errand:

Kate: Daddy, why are grown-ups so angry and bossy?

She asked him this after Mark had asked Kale if he had changed his underwear while getting dressed. Kale said no and stormed off to change them.

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At lunch after church:

Mark: Jack, sit down. Do not stand up in your highchair.

Jack: Eh?

Mark: Sit down!

Jack: Eh?

Mark: Don't talk to me that way.

Jack: Eh?

I'm not kidding you. Jack was having a conversation with attitude with Mark. It was hilarious!

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I noticed as I was typing this that all the conversations were with Mark. I just had the joy of listening to them!

Good friends

A couple weeks ago we went to a friend's house in Mancos. After we worked at their house we went for a little fun at the park. Not much to blog about but we took a few cute pictures. Had to post em.

Our good friends Bill and Jen.

Bill and Jen's son, Toby. He's Kale's little buddy.
Here's Kale showing a little love to his friend {notice the heart Kale's making}.

Good buds.

And of course the princess.

Have you ever...

...wondered what happens to children between the hours of 4 and 6pm? Mine disappear and are replaced with crazy little people! They return right after dinner and are usually wonderful until bedtime. But between 4 & 6? Man oh man....

Thankful Thursday

Today I am thankful for fall. My favorite season. Here are a few gorgeous pictures that Mark took the other morning. He took them from the Lion's Den - an overlook of Durango.

So thankful for God's creation, His beauty, His glory, His everchanging seasons and His unchanging love and faithfulness.

Pumpkin Patchin

Last Thursday our homeschool group went for another field trip. This time to Sutherland Farms in New Mexico - about 40 minutes from here. We were led around to the different activities which helped a ton with our crew and navigating the farm.

Here we are learning about the different types of plants the farm grows. Gourds, squash, green chilies, and of course pumpkins.

Kale listening intently. By the way, when the gentleman held up a green chili and asked if the kids knew what it was, Kale spoke up and said "A pickle!" Ummmm, no. Good try though. Can you tell we eat lots of pickles and green chilies?

Joelle, Anna and Kale on the tractor hayride.

Beautiful pumpkin fields

After the hayride the kids rode on the train.

I love this picture. Little miss princess Elizabeth looking for her pumpkin carriage!

Hanging out in the corn pit. Isaiah, Kate, Anna and Kale

Kale wanted people to bury him in the corn.

I love taking pictures over the shoulder. Good thing he was smiling!

Kale and Anna racing through the corn maze.

After the maze we were allowed to go to the "baby" pumpkin patch and pick out the perfect pumpkin. I don't know what happened to the picture of Kate and her perfect pumpkin...

Then we got to go to the store and buy honey sticks. YUM!

Part of the crew. Anna, Kale, Kate, Makenna, Liberty and Ashley.

Next week the homeschool group is heading to Mesa Verde. Should be fun!

Adventures in Mommyland -- Swiss Family Questions!

Some days the questions are just too much. I mean, how do you answer some of these?

*Mom, why are there white lines on the road?
To keep you in your lane.
Why?
Because it's safe in your own lane
Why are they dotted?
To let you know it's safe to pass.
If there's a car there how is it safe to pass?

*Mom, why are there yellow lines on the road?
To keep you in your lane and let you know you may NOT pass...
Why?
To keep you safe.
Why?

*Mom, what's diabetes?
A disease that means you have a hard time eating lots of sugar.
Do you catch it if you rub up against the wrong person?
No. You can get it from your parents. Like you have blue eyes because daddy has blue eyes. Sometimes our bodies are made just like our parents.
Why?
Cause that's how God does it?
Why?

*Mom, what's Autism?
Um......a behavior disorder {knowing full well this is not answering the question really}
What is that?
Um.......um........{seriously not sure how to describe Autism to him...} How about them Broncos?

*Mom, why do people have legs?
So we can stand and jump and walk around.
Why?
Because that's how God made us.
Why?
Because!

My brain eventually starts to hurt and I have to ask them to stop asking questions. I really can not break some of this stuff down into child-like bites. It can be SO challenging to try and explain complicated things to a child and have it make sense. Normal, everyday things that we take for granted knowing. Parenting is hard on the brain!

Kudos to every teacher, parent, Sunday school teacher etc...who break things down into teachable pieces. Daily my brain is mush from questions!

Our fall tradition

Fall is my favorite season. My favorite! I love the colors, I love the feeling, I love that the holidays are coming, I love the weather - cool in the morning and night and warm during the day.

Mark loves fall too. We always try to get up in the mountains at least once so we can take pictures and drink in God's beautiful creation. This year we went up past Lemon Dam. Neither of us had been that far up, and even though many of the colors hadn't even changed yet, it was still beautiful and we were able to get some great pictures of our favorite subjects. :)

Our first attempt at a family picture. Kate wasn't diggin' it.

That is until we took "Ariel" pictures. Whenever that girl sees a big rock she can sit on, she says it's an Ariel rock and wants daddy to take her picture.

And she's even more beautiful than Ariel.

And goofier too!

Then you add in brotherly love. Too bad there's a piece of grass in their face.

He got two more top teeth and everything was in his mouth. In order to keep out twigs and rocks I gave him the straw...

Smile that beautiful smile!

Totally distracted by his siblings.

One of the good ones.

I love this one too.

Not sure about the face but it was still kinda cute.

This was so stinkin' adorable!

This wasn't from Lemon but Mark took it up near Purgatory. So gorgeous and had to be included in the fall pics.